DONKEY PUNCH

Boys in Charleston: The Good, The Bad, and the Oh-Sick-You're-So-Ugly:

Meet John Tucker. Ladies... chances are that you've met him. Chances are that you've slept with him. Here's the thing - he's the George Clooney of regular people. George is notorious for his special gift... when he talks to you, he makes you feel like you're the only woman in the world. The problem is that he makes every woman feel that way. John Tucker has the same gift, and he also takes after his teeny-bopper film counterpart. You see, his secret is that he doesn't commit. If he doesn't commit, he's never technically doing anything wrong. So, even though he treats you like a gf... pursues you, gives you the greatest sex, cuddles you after, takes you to breakfast the next morning, makes you mixed CDs, talks to you about his feelings, makes future plans with you... even when you see him on a date with someone else, you can't TECHNICALLY get mad at him. He never said he was only dating you. The thing is, I don't need to be EXCLUSIVE. Neither do most women. It just usually happens that way when you're hanging out with someone you like. But John Tucker... it's like it's his job to date as many women as possible at one time. I think it's his mission to try and see how many girls he can get to like him at once. A lot of my friends have been there, and now I've been there (and I HATE incest!). So ladies, beware... if he looks like an Affleck, and he acts like George... you may have John Tucker on your hands.