Best Seat In the House (Caution: Slippery When Wet)

The best seat in Charleston is hands down the Chef’s table at Oak. Word to the wise: don’t take your sweet ole Granny unless she’s ready to get wild – the Chef’s table is not for the faint of heart… it’s far from tame, oozing sensuality with the steam rising from the kitchen and the hot, sweaty men screaming “why is this f*@king plate still sitting here” within it. You’re surrounded by gorgeous men: there’s Brett McKee who is just a rock star, plain and simple. Then there’s the bad boy sous chef – a.k.a. Joaquin Phoenix circa “Walk the Line;” there’s Scott Caan/Astin who looks like secret service; there’s Braveheart/Gladiator who’s got a sweet face but tattoos up and down his sides; and then there’s Grecian, who’s probably the dullest tool in the shed, but he sure is perrrrty. If you’re lucky enough, like the Go’Diva sisters were this weekend, you’ll have their full attention, braised with very purposeful and not at all pure intentions. The food is fantastic, but let’s be honest – they could serve franks and beans and, with a staff like that, we’d still keep coming again and again.

Trust MY Palate - Give this place a second chance

Yes, first impressions are huge - but a little make up can go a long way. Take the Grand Opening for The Trusted Palate, (www.thetrustedpalate.com), last night. We immediately approved of the ambiance...the antique mirrors adjourning one entire wall (for sale), the dark lighting and the easy-on-the-eyes employees. We sat down and were greeted by a young waitress. Cute, sweet, bubbly, but had no idea about any of the wines or the cheeses. We asked three questions, very general, all answered with, "Let me ask the owner or chef". We of course love one-on-one time with the owner and chef, but come on - the servers should be a LITTLE knowledge. Not her fault, we fault the owner & chef for not providing the proper training before opening night.

Somewhat miffed by the lack of attention we were getting and I'm sure showing it on our face, Ian, the owner makes his way over. He was marvelous, gracious and sexy - he immediately made us forget we were annoyed. He did just what an owner should do on opening night: introduce himself, tell us a little about him, his plans for the future, credentials, wine recommendations, etc. Ian is a class act and has great plans for wine in Charleston; definitely check him out on the website above.

When it came time for ordering a few cheeses off of their extensive a la carte style cheese menu, we beckoned the chef, Dillon. He was as sweet as could be, didn't look a day over 27, flushed cheeks and all. He described and pointed out each cheese, well done, although we could have used a bit more enthusiasm and knowledge (didn't immediately know if the cheese was sheeps or cows milk).

Overall, things could have been done better. We were expecting a Grand Opening party, and aside from the band that started at 8:00, it was more of a relaxed, quiet evening at a wine & cheese (and meat) lounge - granted we did leave at 8:30. Nothing was on the house - completely ludicrous for a grand opening party. The bathrooms, because they are brand new and probably have some form of disinfectant all over them, smelled a little like the vet where I take my cat. And the no tap water/only bottled water offering is pretentious - even for us.

This said, we'll still come back because the cheese and meat selection was phenomenal, each wine we tried was excellent, and of course there's Ian.

Split Decision

While I commend my Go'Diva counterpart for her synopsis below, I will have an equally enthralling post after the Republican debate. This is after all, South Carolina.

POLITICO DIVA

This will be a long entry and hopefully spur quite a bit of comment from the peanut gallery (that’s you). I scored the hottest ticket in town last night – the Democratic Presidential Primary Debate. Here’s my scoop:

The You Tube format was one of the smartest things I’ve seen. To have real people asking straight questions with emotion is something rarely seen in politics. Even though the people making the videos were quite strange (if that’s “average America,” the phrase “anti-American” is not looking as bad as it used to), it was real. In so many cases, politics ignore the emotional element in an equation. Iraq – let’s look at budget, number of troops, benefit vs. risk of pulling out, costs associated, etc. – but when you have a man showing the flags that laid on the coffins of three of his family members, including his eldest son, it’s hard to ignore the emotional element, which is what all of us “average Americans” really care about. That was one of the more powerful videos (http://youtube.com/user/gwberryY). The two most entertaining were a snowman asking how the candidates were going to protect his snowboy from melting from global warming (http://youtube.com/user/kotasHQ), and a man playing his guitar singing about taxes (http://youtube.com/watch?v=3LH6SuSTvX4). The most disturbing was clearly when a man asked about the candidates’ stance on gun control, asking how he will know his baby is safe. He then says, “this is my baby,” and pulls out a huge machine gun looking thing. It’s too sick for me to even discuss.

Now the candidates:

Hillary Clinton is just phenomenal. She is the smartest one up there and has invaluable experience in the White House. She embraces the human element… she referenced all of the people in the videos by name. Some may say that’s “political” but I say it’s personal. As her campaign video humorously suggested, “Sometimes the best man for the job is a woman.” Agreed.

I love Barack Obama. Who cares about experience when you have all that passion? He’s poised, he’s charismatic and he’s truly passionate for change. And he seems to have a bi-partisan viewpoint which is a great thing for unity. I heard people grumbling that they thought he was guarded and scripted at the debate. Well you should have seen him at the after party. I saw more charisma and passion in his speech there than I did all night at the debate… he preached in a way reminiscent of MLK until the room exploded in applause.

John Edwards… swoon. He is awfully cute. Kennedy cute. He seems like such a nice man, but he also seems like such a “politician” to me. With every question, he’d turn it around with, “But I think the real question is….” The real question is the one that was asked, John. I wonder how sincere everything is – but maybe that’s just the twinkle in his sparkly eyes. I also HATED his comment on Hillary’s jacket – that was classless.

I like Joe Biden and I think he’s in the race. I particularly liked how he called the gunman in the video a complete loon. Joe has movie star white teeth and a wife who is just itching to wear her “First Lady” sash.

Dennis Kucinich – A funny, quirky, likable little ball of energy who gave a great debate. And I’m sure he’s related to Ross Perot.

William Richardson – sweet as cherry pie, but probably not the next President.

Chris Dodd – Was he the one who did the white hair bunny video? If not, I can’t quite remember him.

Mike Gravel – What a nut.

Anderson Cooper – wait, he’s not a candidate. Maybe he should be. He’s awfully cute as well.

Of course I will watch the Republican debate before penning in my vote, or else my republican Go’Diva Sister may divorce me, BUT…

My ticket: President – Hillary Rodham Clinton; Vice President – Barack Obama

Quickly on the social aspect… Three celeb sightings at the debate – The crazy director from Entourage!, Ernie Hudson from “Ghostbusters” and some guy from “The West Wing.” I think I was at the wrong after party. I thought it would be crawling with gorgeous politico men who were just dying to tell me their views on how to bridge the race gap in the South. Sadly, this was not the case. I even wore my very best Jackie O outfit. Oh well, at least John Edwards touched my hand.

Sonnet - To Poes

When I think about Go’Diva Sisters, I think about exclusive panty parade parties, the finest restaurants, the “hidden” spots around town and good old fashion juicy gossip… but sometimes, we just need to state the obvious. Poes. It doesn’t get much better than rolling off the beach or boat around 4pm on a Sunday and strolling into Poes for margaritas, queso dip and fish tacos. Will I ever fail to donk around at Poes come 4? Quoth the Raven, “Nevermore.”

A Couple of Things...

Last Saturday night I dined at La Fourchette on King Street. It was my third occasion and for the third time in a row, I absolutely loved it. From the moment you walk in and get greeted and kissed by the French owner Perig, you feel like you're back in Paris at your favorite restaurant. After you look around, and you notice your surrounded by chic, local couples, you all of a sudden feel lucky to have gotten a table with only 24 hour notice.

Now onto next week...I’ve heard positive buzz about The Trusted Palette, located at 563 King. I love that it’s on upper King, walking distance to Rue de Jean and I have a feeling the Go’Divas will be present for their opening night 7/24.

WHY? and HOW?

"In the demi-monde of footwear, the term croc was once synonymous with elegance—the reptile skin covering a pair of stiletto sling-backs. Today, it's synonymous with an entirely different—and altogether vegetarian—phenomenon. In just a few years, the exquisitely ugly shoes known as "Crocs" have spread around the world like a Paris Hilton sex tape, giving rise to an epidemic of croc babies and their more egregious counterparts, croc parents." - Meghan O'Rourke
WE DO NOT SUPPORT CROCS. The mere fact that a sweet little city like Charleston has been defaced with these rubber NASA decontamination foot covers is beyond me, but please have some pride and dignity, do not wear them. Trust your instincts, they are heinous and it's not okay.

The Untouchables

What I've come to discover is that Chefs in Charleston are like rockstars or actors in L.A. They're not just hot and cocky, they're untouchable. How do you get with these guys? How do you get in the inner circle? Unfortunately, I don't have the answer. Do you have to be in the F&B industry? It's a whole different life you know - they're nocturnal, they have sophisticated palettes, and I'm sure they snort the white stuff. Do you meet them at events? At least then they're out in front of everybody. Do you send them notes back to the kitchen? (I tried that maneuver tonight so I'll let you know if it proves successful.) Take Chef Brett McKee. The bald head, the jeans, the cowboy hat, the neck and snake-up-the-arms tattoos... if I ran into him on the street, I'd run for my life. But because he's the executive Chef at Oak... hot. And don't even get me started on his sous chef. If you're single, and up to the challenge, reserve the chef's table at Oak (Brett, Adam), at Tristan (Aaron), at Cordavi (Dave)... and your dessert is sure to come with extra cream.

Speculation

Since blasting our blog to everyone in Charleston we have received some of the most endearing e-mails. We thank you! Some of them have provided hours of laughs. Our most common inquiry is about who we are, what is our identity?!?!?! People have been dropping names left and right. We're thinking of posting a running tally or poll for the most commonly suggested names, then the top name will be given the opportunity to post a blog on our site, because obviously they must be luxurious if people think she/they are us. While we have heard and met and are actually friends with some of the suggestions, there are a few people out there we'd love to meet! Keep those e-mails coming and don't be shy, post live comments on the blog!

Xoxo,
The Go'Divas

First In Line

There's this chick here in Charleston, who really rubs me the wrong way...while we did agree that we would refrain from using names when degrading others on our blog, as soon as I describe her you may know exactly who I am speaking of...
First of all, over a year ago when my fiancé was still a boyfriend, we were at a party where cocaine was the party favor of choice. I was annoyed and punished him for being there. So there he is talking to this woman and sees that I'm agitated and says, "Will you please excuse me, GoDiva #1 is angry with me so I'd like to go speak with her"...well this woman has the audacity to respond..."Oh please, don't run to her...make her come to you, show her who's boss"...are you kidding me? If I had known that she said that when I was still there I would have publicly reminded her that it's never a good thing to wear tight white Capri pants when you have dimpled saddlebags and thighs that rub together. So that was her first offense. Well several months later we attended her Christmas party. When we got there, it wasn't a house she was throwing the soiree in, it was the clubhouse of her rundown apartment complex. Not only did I ruin my brand new Italian leather stilettos tromping through the wet grass, but they were only serving beer and some cheap hangover inducing chardonnay. We left immediately. That was offense #2.
You will know who I am talking about when and if you meet this woman when your initial reaction to her face is, "WHOA, she was obviously first in line when God was handing out teeth".
If you think you know who I am speaking of, please leave a comment with your horror story and what you think her teeth say about her.